I am bored with life (Please read additional details)?

What does one do when their life feels empty? I am always told that I should volunteer but that's a personal choice. I'll admit it, I think about myself first. Before you try to bash me, just understand that I didn't really choose to feel this way, but at some point in my life I turned into who I am now. If I could feel differently about the world I would but I've been lonely most of my life. Ever since I was a kid I didn't have my parents around that often and when I was around them it wasn't a profound belonging. I've never felt like I belonged much to anywhere and especially since I am gay this magnifies this sense of isolation even more. I feel empty and lifeless. The only thing that keeps me optimistic is life itself. It pisses me off how people wake up everyday and never really truly appreciate life for how beautiful it is. I like to be out in nature and really just feel how wonderful it all is. No one I know seems to see things the way I do. I feel suppressed in so many ways ually and emotionally because it seems like the world beats me into submission no matter how much I try to fight back. So I end up being in my house, in a boring city, in a boring state listening to music and just try and find peace. After awhile, although it's soothing, this unfulfilled feeling consumes me and I once again feel so empty. Like I need something more, but I don't know what it is.